Thursday, December 15, 2011

In The House Of Hope

From my intent there hides a seed
And from my aim there evades a deed,
In the shadows by a dying hearth of heed
Are Forgotten dreams of a forgotten creed,
Recondite beneath the sheets of need
Queiscent are those unsaid words not freed,
All the while the child that was me
Laughs irreverent, mockingly.
Its a game where none that meant to be found
seek those that were plainly always around.
Watch ever vigilant, lest they slip by,
As they tried when the path last went awry.

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

By the lake of sunset yellow

I found unassailable walls in your company; safety from legions of the could-have-been, armed with the stealth of regret and the could-be, armed with the ferocity of discretion. It was an exhilarating bubble of the purest kind of freedom.

Isn't that..?

Yes, that’s him.

Why is he here?

You've read his books, haven’t you? Genius always exacts a price. He walked the tightrope of sanity every time he wrote. The last time he tried to do it on a unicycle juggling elephants.

Do you remember that painting we saw on the sidewalk the last time we met, the kind that makes sense only when seen from one particular vantage? I feel like we stopped moving right there when we were together. Now you’re gone, and I’m alone, speeding away in a car that won’t stop. Life’s become a jumble of colors and lines that makes sense only in memories.

How are you feeling today?

(Silence)

Would you like to talk about her today?

That's all I ever do.

In the darkness, I can tell you, time passes different. Lifetimes in little chunks, served with a generous sprinkle of melancholy and a side of slow poison. Your absence has been my longest night.

He killed her?

Don't just watch the tapes, read his file. This one rarely allows coherence to threaten his insanity.

Now that you're gone the bubble is broken and I’m in a free fall. The world moves towards me at an alarming velocity, and I’m without weight, insubstantial until I’m crushed by it.

She didn't exist. She was in your head.

How does that make her any less real?

Wednesday, September 07, 2011

The Not So Grim But Maybe Slightly Melancholy Reaper

Grayscale:

Color:


The flames of hell were supposed to surround the reaper completely. Wasn't in the mood to complete it.

Random thought:

Satan's worst nightmare? A sinful masochist.



Saturday, August 27, 2011

The Cycle of Faith Part 1

Note: I've written a lot of discontinued stories that have teetered off the narrow plateau of my interest, but THIS one I intend to finish in the next two months. Here's to hoping my resolve stands. 
***



An age of darkness loomed over the planet. Evil had emerged and in its thrall was a nation. The banner of the swastika was hoisted. Under its corrupting shadow, hatred was exalted. Cruelty was celebrated. Men treated men as vermin. Evil in its many forms spread forth its dark tentacles, and the crimson mist of war was ubiquitous. Even those that would be saviors cast aside morality and bowed to the cold tyranny of expedience.



So it was that the radiance of a thousand suns burst at once into the sky, and the world trembled to the will of mortals.

From afar the Ancients watched, from a place of banished terrors. Deities of old, their connection weakened without the worship and sacrifices of mortals. They recognized the danger of this new power man wielded. The destruction of humanity was imminent, and consequentially their own. The Forgotten would be set adrift in the void until they faded away.

A plan was conceived by the minds that birthed monstrosities. Though their power had waned, they still had their servants upon the physical plane. For millennia, through their creatures of darkness, they had gently plucked the web they wove to alter the course of man’s destiny as much as they were able. Those servants they would use to avert such an apocalypse, and
at long last,
to restore them to their former glory.



Suckling babes were stolen from their parents, orphans of war from uncaring caretakers. Children in thousands were taken away. With them as the forerunners, a new realm was created, where the hard-earned knowledge and wisdom of the past was lost to man. A realm where mortals
learned to live in terror of the Old Gods once more.


In time, the rest of humanity destroyed itself; a remainder lived on, as slaves to the Ancients.

***
Drey, of unknown lineage
November, 4286 AD
It was the coldest winter I had ever lived through, but that wasn't saying much. I was only twelve winters old. Kal, who was a veteran of fifteen, claimed if it got any colder you could grab a handful of winter and sculpt a God's heart. Kal was always saying things like that though. I stopped believing his tales ever since I found him earnestly trying to sell a pouch of ineffectually perfumed sewage as a divine nectar that bestowed immortality. Also learned that day was caution when offered anything he claimed safe to consume.
The Capital wasn’t far away, which was a good thing. I didn’t particularly like traveling on snow laden roads and neither did Gray. I looked over to the stall where Gray was put up and watched his shank rise and fall. He had the right idea, but sleep was being rather spiteful to me. The pony’s snores were oddly similar to Kal’s. Or maybe I just missed him a lot. I pulled at the hair on my chin as I reminisced.
It was almost a year ago that I met Kalivaer. Kalivaer, he never did things the usual way. His way of saying hello involved knocking me out cold when I was asleep and dragging me off to the basement of a house that looked like it would collapse with a slightly forceful exhalation. I woke up to a skull that felt like it was split in two, and the bluest eyes I’d ever seen. Below them was a grin the length of the Griffin Road.
‘Finally if fleetingly freed from the clutches of the nightstalker! Excellent,’ he said with a clap. Questions about who the hell he was and where hell I was and if he wanted a fist knocking his teeth into the back of his head were forestalled by a dramatic wave of a scrawny hand. ‘Look around you, and remember how this feels my new friend, the nascence of a legend. Mark this day, soon we’ll be making history, you and I,’ he cackled as I clutched my head groaning.
He became the closest I had to kin.
A few weeks ago the Priests arrived; everyone in the city knew to stay low and pray that neither family nor friend was given the honor of their attention. But Kal, the stubborn fool, said ‘They only have as much power over you as you allow them. Ideas, Drey, are only as strong as our belief in them. Besides, empty streets, unattended carts. Tonight, we feast!’
He got picked off the street by the powerless idea when he was trying to sneak off with a pant full of radishes, of all things.
That was how I ended up on the trail to rescue him. Or at the least give it a try, even if it meant I wouldn't live to see those couple of hairs on my chin grow into the magnificent beard I knew they had the potential to become.
‘C’est la vie,’ I said to the thatched ceiling, rubbing my jaw.
***
Arkhanen, son of Terberon the second
August, 3157 AD
Unnatural breeze stirred the claws of leafless autumn trees, their branches raking the moon, leaving pale blue scars on its bloodless face. Restless fireflies lit the clearing, bound by the black cloaked shamans with rites that sanctified the earth upon which I now stood. All the clans of the east were gathered to witness with glittering eyes. Even the babes were silent, clutching at their parents with tiny hands.
In the midst of them all, at the eye of the whirlpool of fireflies lay the body of mine uncle. There was the man who raised my brothers and sisters and me, the man who taught me the ways of honor and steel. It felt like yesterday that I stood at this very place, filled with fierce joy, and my uncle stood to anoint me as Daeryon, an apprentice to the elite warriors of Moon-fire. Eyes that were filled with pride now stared eternally into the worlds beyond eyes closed.
From the fore of the multitude my younger siblings looked on with impassive faces as the eldest of us awaited till the shadow of the headstone to fully shroud the Chief. What I saw planted a seed of prophetic dread. Within my elder brother’s heart that I knew was a husk washed out by sorrow he felt a spark of anger.
‘As was, so shall be,’ he said, his voice drawing blood from the silence. The spark had been fanned to a flame, and his tone betrayed the fury he felt.
The grass around my uncle, my brother and me was sucked in and beneath us the features of a visage was formed from the bloodied mud. The earth opened its maw and swallowed my uncle, as it had swallowed generations of Moon-Fire. Never sated, never at peace, forever ravenous. The face then dissolved, yet in my mind I could still see it, betraying prodigious avarice and smiling with glee at the inevitability of the words that would escape the lips of my brother.
‘War,’ he whispered into the quiescence, and where a wound was once his voice dealt a deathblow, and the clans bayed at the cold uncaring moon.
***
Rya, daughter of Rebert the Fourth
March, 3963 AD
The walls of the dungeons were smooth. I had scratched the walls a thousand times, but there wasn't a single mark. Something in me was dying, and there would be nothing for it to be remembered by.
The single torch that lit the cell flickered. Shadows were written on the walls like messages from another world. A world where I was free. A world where I wasn't chosen. The fire laughed mockingly. A world out of my reach.
I couldn’t remember the last time I slept. I only remembered it was before my last visitor. He was dressed in black silk. When he moved he was like one of the messages. Grey flickers against the wall, like a promise of ancient terrors. A reminder of the darkness man learned to fear.
He came with a chalice. It had been days since I ate when he came. Back when I roamed the Throne, ignorant of the fetters they had placed upon me, I had been taught what to expect. I drank its contents without a word. It was sweet as poison, it was bitter as death.
No words, however, could prepare me for what I felt after. There was something dying. There was something dying, and there was something killing it, both in me. It was ravenous. It was strong. It made me afraid. It made me repulsively ecstatic.
In time, as I knew would happen, the door opened again. A naked man crawled into the room, chained and broken, on the inside and out. The rest was a blur of red.
When I came to again, there was blood on the floor. There was blood on the walls. There was blood on the ceiling. There was a human body ripped to shreds.
That night I finally slept.
The next morning I woke as a Goddess.
***

Friday, August 12, 2011

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

As the Gears Groan

The frigid heart of the machine beat within glass halls.
Life condensed, conforming, upon its unfeeling walls.
A blank slate conceived, molded to its wearer's shape;
On it wrote a covert hand, tiny tears through the drapes.

The heart will stop, the droplets will flee to another cage.

Every not so often, when a brave breath fogs the ghastly glass,
will emerge an ephemeral escaping moment of revelation; of the eternal snake in the goddamn grass.

Monday, July 18, 2011

RAVEN!

Displayed is the tattoo art I made for a friend today. Admittedly the lines aren't sleek and the particular kind of ink and the kind of paper I used proved to be a disastrous combination. These pictures however, should be considered more for their potential than for what the are currently, which by no means is the Sistine bloody chapel of tattoo sketches.


The art looks better the more its minimized, but that isn't a good thing is it? Ah well. Beggars can't be choosers, and neither can lazy men who refuse to redo their art.



The first scan:



Dark wings, dark words. Beware the raven's flight.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Monday blues

A respite was desperately needed in the midst of "The battle against my tenacious, devious nemesis, the writer's block". I've turned to my old and close friend, sketching, to provide a much overdue indulgence in the creative process. Below is the result. Before you consider it, I must caution you that it has been a while since I've put pen to paper for reasons other than to write streams of profanities as a venting mechanism.

I present to you, ANGEL.





Or actually, half of her. I inevitably made a mistake while drawing a part of her which led to her dismemberment for aesthetic reason (RIP artistic error).

I also scanned her prior to a few embellishments. Below are the results.




My nemesis has let the war dogs loose to wreak havoc again, so I am now at a loss for delightful parting words that hint at deep wisdom. Guess I'll have to settle for: I'm hungry. Ciao.

PS:: Dedicated to a girl I was a scumbag enough to hurt deeply. Hope that someday soon she can fly away from all the pain I've caused.


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

One Last Time part 1

Sector Five greeted the rising sun with silence. The wind made no sound as it swept across the roads of an abandoned city. The maintenance bots made no sound as they about the tasks hard-coded into them. The ghosts of the people that once lived there didn’t even try.

The source of that silence was a ragged man in dirty old clothes walking in a derelict building. It was the little things that made that man almost-smile those days, and that day it was finding an abandoned armory.

He’d been in Sector Five for about a year. He’d thought he’d picked the city clean, but hell, even gods made mistakes. He was living evidence.

The armory was untouched, which was surprising. The Last Launch, or The Cowardly Flight of The High and Mighty Filth as Lucy called it, was a noisy affair that left all the armories of sector Five with nothing more than the stench of panicky soldiers and dried up puddles of their piss.

He would’ve loved the array of choices in that particular armory, Lucy would have. Lucy liked guns the way he liked wine. The older the better, he used to say. What he really meant, of course, was the noisier the better.

They made an odd team in that sense, Lucy and he. Lucy loved cacophony, but his superpower was to exert silence. Yet in the ways that mattered, it was a perfect team. Covert ops, a brief stint as bank thieves, even the goddamn rebellion they came through unscathed. The one day he couldn’t have Lucy’s back, his partner went up and died on him.

The first time since he listened to Lucy’s last words, he felt a tickle in his head that meant someone was speaking. Schweigen, it said, long time no see.

It had been a long time since he’d heard that name used, and the unkempt man felt a wave of self-hatred, guilt and sadness flow through him. His hands trembled slightly in his pockets as he continued to stare at the guns, his back to the suddenly arrived.

The ragged man who was once called Schweigen did not move for a while. The person in the dark clothing and mask stood behind him, similarly still, waiting. Finally, with great effort, Schwiegen lifted the silence that lay upon the city and pulled that stifling blanket back into himself.

***

One more off the list, thought Specter as Bounce jumped off the tallest building in the world. ‘Have I ever told you that you scream like a little girl,’ he shouted after Bounce, grinning as he listened to Bounce’s fading cry of joy.

Specter took the piece of paper out of his pocket, ticking the appropriate item. There were only two left unchecked. The grin slowly faded away.

The illusion that masked their aimless existence would fade away once those two things were done. They would be adrift in an empty world. He’d been trying to find the right moment to broach the subject with Bounce, but could find none.

They would have to return to Sector Nine. Find a role to play amongst the last of humanity left on the planet. They could make a new list of course, inventive and entertaining, but Specter was unable to bring himself to like the idea. The vacation had gone on long enough, and the thought of doing nothing constructive frustrated him.

What he feared though was that he would be unable convince Bounce. It was almost a month ago, when Specter mentioned High-Command in the passing. They were reminiscing about the good old Rebellion days, and Specter wanted to gauge his reaction. Bounce suddenly went very still, and his generally amiable face became scarily expressionless. Don’t ever mention that bastard’s name in my presence again, Bounce said, and that was that.

Specter watched Bounce fly across the city, over rooftops of buildings that once would’ve been overflowing with people. He smelled a slight stench and reminded himself that they'd have to head back to the Repository so he could possess a new body. The last time he'd waited too long his corpse had decomposed to such an extent he literally had to clip his nose. Bounce refused to travel with him, claiming he'd puke his entire digestive system out if he came within a mile of Specter

‘How’s life, Specter?’ asked a grating voice, startling him out of malodorous memories. ‘Haven’t heard that one before,’ snorted Specter sarcastically to the figure in the black clothing and mask that had abruptly appeared beside him.

***

High-Command looked at the map that marked the current locations of the Supers. Three down, two to go, he thought, watching the dots that marked Specter, Bounce and Schweigen move towards Sector Nine.

It had been a busy three years since High-Command had last seen them. He had helped the normals organize, turn them into a functioning society. Sector Nine had three hundred people now, each with a sense of purpose. They still searched for more of course. Every month saw two or three increase their numbers. There is hope for those left behind, Priest always told them, we're not abandoned as long as we have each other.

It was just a few days ago in their weekly meetings that Priest had said that he no longer had to use his power to raise their spirits. About time they grew a pair, Buzz replied as Priest shook her head disapprovingly and High-Command brought out the bottle of champagne to celebrate.

All that they had built now stood to be destroyed. The last people on earth faced a threat that could wipe them out. If they were to stand a chance, High-Command would need all the Supers to re-unite.

With a feral grin on his face, High-Command planned for battle, for what could very well be the last time.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Unfurl The Tale of Murl part 1

A little something I started to write on a whim and continue to write for a nephew, a niece and a friend's future children. Solemn promises shall be made and kept to help with big words.


Guitars without strings are sad, very sad things,
Oh yes, sadder still than kingdomless kings,
And bees without stings, and fingerless rings,
Much, much sadder than children without swings.
So my dear friend Murl, the stringless guitar,
was the saddest thing in these lands by far.

One warm night when Murl left the door ajar,
Full of light and joy wandered in a star.
She looked at Murl who never could sleep
Seeing his sad plight, she began to weep.
She said, "Oh, your woeful state breaks my heart,
To aid, to help you, I will do my part."

From a pocket in her magical cloak
She drew forth a song, and a lot of smoke,
And Murl and the star gagged and coughed and choked
"The rainbow played a prank, and unprovoked,
Filling my magical pockets with smoke.
And it wasn't even that funny a joke."

While the rainbow, in hiding, giggled in glee
The star somewhat regained her dignity.
The straggling wisps Murl tried to ignore
As the song struggled against the hand it wore.
So the star set free the desperate song
Told Murl it would lead to where strings belong.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Advent

Its 2 am and we’re on our way back to the city. The world is silent, and it’s just me, Jay and Radiohead. She murmurs along sleepily as Thom Yorke sings his heart out, trying to stay awake to keep me company. “You sure you don’t want to get some sleep?” I ask her, smiling. I already know what she’s going to say and sure enough there’s a sound that vaguely resembles a no.

I excavate the bottle of water from the bag firmly secure in Jay’s encircled arms and take a gulp. I’m glad we’d gone on this crazy impulse of a trip. I had to get out of Bangalore to try to coax inspiration to come out of its bloody hole and me and Jay just reached the point in our relationship where we knew neither of us was a crazy axe murderer, so I took her along. It worked like a charm. I managed to get a tenuous hold on my muse, which needless to say was better than none at all, and Jay got the break she needed to stave off becoming a part of the corporate zombie horde.

The car is going at a comfy eighty and the blurry thick lines that are the streetlights melt and revolve into a pinprick of the night. The tiny dot grows and grows, and the breaks screech to a halt. The darkness is a vortex and I lose all sense of space and direction. ‘Fuck!’ I scream. The breaks screech and there’s screaming like a faint background score building up to something horrific. The world is consumed.

There is blood everywhere. There is a sword in my hand and it gleams hungrily as the crimson seeps into it. I feel its insatiable hunger and roar. My army is death manifest and there is nothing that can stop me. The creatures pouring through the mountain pass fall to a sword blessed by The Destroyer himself.

‘General!’ I hear someone shout. Through the fog of bloodlust in my mind a thin light of recognition forces itself. ‘What is it?’ I snap to the burly man as I remove myself from the frontline and the reserve steps in to take my place. A voice that sounds like stones grating emerges from the burly figure in the blackened armour. “We’re being pushed back in the west. Your brother requests reinforcements.’

‘Pushed back? That was their weakest point!’ I grate.

The fellow hesitates. ‘They’ve turned they're elites loose upon us, General. The Hounds have taken to field.’

‘Finally,’ I growl with joy, and lightning crackles in the starless sky.

‘Quickly, quickly, he’s loosing blood,’ someone says, and I grin. I feel like I’m moving but I’m on my back how could that be? ‘Jay,’ I mumble thickly as a face peeps from the sky the face has Lennon glasses but this couldn’t be Lennon when did Lennon get so fat? ‘Give peace a chance,’ I beg indistinctly and there’s a sound of wheels rolling and the wails of an ambulance sirens from somewhere very far away where am I where’s Jay?

Everything is white, clean and sterile its upsetting white is bad white is pain so much pain ‘Jay!’ I scream but it’s strangled by my cruel throat and only its death cries emerge.

The Hounds were disappointing. They were skilful, quick and would have been formidable, perhaps, even against the best of this army mine. But they didn’t fight my army. They fought me.

The customary challenge was made at night, when the armies of the Floating city had withdrawn. The Hounds against me, a battle to the death. They couldn’t refuse such generosity, or as they thought, such foolishness.

I killed them all.

The splendor of the Floating City is enough to make even the most hardened veteran in my army gasp. Its beauty is unparalleled, an aberration in the ugly mottled dawn of the netherworld. The king is in chains, kneeling, and I can taste the despair that swirls about him. He holds his head high. That can be changed. And it is.

The headless body spasms as I walk away. The Floating City is mine. As will be all the realm and the worlds. ‘Emperor,’ I whisper to myself. It starts to rain.

I’ve got a pleasant buzz in my head. It’s been a month since the fucking crash that destroyed me. My life came down like a deck of cards faced down by the big bad wolf. But none of that mattered. Except that Jay was.. Jay was dead.

My hand raises itself to indicate the requirement of another shot of vodka. Morosely numb, I think to myself and snort. If Jay were here she’d probably be pretty cross at how I'm coping, but what the fuck, she wasn’t, and that was precisely why I'm coping how I'm coping in the first flaming place.

The booze is, additionally, generous enough to keep the disturbing hallucinations and dreams that plagued me since the accident away.

It also helps me forget how much I enjoy the bloodshed in them.

The shot comes and disappears. A childhood memory flashes.

I’m by my grandmother’s bed, and her eyes are closed. There isn’t enough life in her to allow such indulgences as the expression of the restlessness she feels, but I can sense it. My mother doesn't know I'm here. My grandmother's eyes crack open, and she beckons me closer. My head has enough ground clearance to be able to see her eye to eye as she turns her head to face me.

The pillow is white, as are the sheets. Clean and sterile. It is sapping her life away. “Should know.. we are.. blood.. the Demon King,” she mumbles. I look at her innocently, uncomprehendingly. “We are the descendants of the Fallen Emporer,” she says suddenly filled with an urgent energy, trying to make me understand. It suddenly slips away again.

She mumbles something, and then mumbles it again. It was the third time that I finally thought I understood what she said.

“Ravan.”

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Tantaluses and Religion/A Priest's Gleeful Rhyme

The lights you think are redemption
The lights that you think are release,
That playfully dance away from your hands,
With such maddening ease.

The lights you think are asylum
The lights that you think are home,
Hang onto strings that're cold-hearted things,
Want you forever to roam.

If only your mind was as cosy
To comfort your exhausted soul,
But there will be no rest, that is what's best,
for the idle are the devil's to cajole.

Monday, January 17, 2011

The Great White Satellite

She of night, of misty light,
See such spite in her delight.
Yearn a sight, a glimpse of white,
Beyond my reach as I might

Such longing will not obey,
That which will begin to fray.
To he that was me, i say,
farewell with a mournful bay.